{"id":15912,"date":"2019-11-07T19:14:49","date_gmt":"2019-11-07T23:14:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/kidshelpphone.ca\/?post_type=articles&p=15912"},"modified":"2023-01-13T09:41:15","modified_gmt":"2023-01-13T13:41:15","slug":"youth-story-bullying-masculinity-and-cultural-perceptions","status":"publish","type":"articles","link":"https:\/\/kidshelpphone.ca\/get-info\/youth-story-bullying-masculinity-and-cultural-perceptions\/","title":{"rendered":"Youth story: Bullying, masculinity and cultural perceptions"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

This story was written by a member of Kids Help Phone\u2019s National Youth Council (NYC).<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Growing up, my Chinese parents told me that boys shouldn\u2019t cry. Instead, boys should be tough, resilient and able to handle their problems by themselves. I don\u2019t blame my parents for raising me this way. They were simply teaching me what they had been taught from a young age. Because of the perception of masculinity in my culture, I felt like I had to suppress my emotions whenever I was going through a difficult time.<\/p>\n\n\n

\n Struggling in silence<\/h2>\n\n\n

I remember experiencing the worst emotional and physical bullying<\/a> of my life in elementary school. The people who were bullying me had pinned me to the wall while they took turns punching me and calling me demeaning names. I couldn\u2019t call for help or fight back. I would simply be blamed for starting the commotion because I was outnumbered. I felt like my teacher ignored my quiet pleas for help. I started to hate school \u2014 a place I had always loved. Coming home from school, I would think of an excuse for the bruises on my legs to tell my family.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019ll never forget the countless nights where I couldn\u2019t sleep<\/a>. Staring at the ceiling for hours, I felt completely helpless. I believed that I would never be able to escape the bullying<\/a>. Neither my teacher nor my old \u201cfriends\u201d had my back. I couldn\u2019t bring myself to tell my parents either, because I was completely and utterly ashamed. Ashamed that I was crying in my bed alone, ashamed that I was being bullied and ashamed that I wasn\u2019t the \u201cman\u201d I thought my parents wanted me to be. I truly believed that I would embarrass my parents if I reached out for help and would be treated as a failure. I continued to suffer in silence. Months would go by, and I continued to fall deeper and deeper into this hole of negativity.<\/p>\n\n\n

\n Getting help<\/h2>\n\n\n

Then one night, Kids Help Phone\u2019s blue logo on a chocolate bar wrapper caught my eye. In desperation, I decided to make a call. This ended up being the best decision of my life. <\/strong>I remember the counsellor\u2019s voice being warm. She asked about how I was feeling and posed questions about my well-being. When she heard me choking back tears, she told me it was OK to cry. All my life people had told me to \u201cman up,\u201d to get over things and to suppress my emotions. And here was someone who finally told me that it was normal to be emotional and to feel things. I cried for the first time in years while on the call.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Talking to a counsellor at Kids Help Phone gave me the courage I needed to report my situation<\/a> to the proper authorities. It also fueled my desire to help other people in the future who may be experiencing bullying themselves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The stigma attached to masculinity and showing emotion is a profound issue. I don\u2019t think young men who are feeling low \u2014 or anyone for that matter \u2014 should be told to just \u201cget over it.\u201d I think it\u2019s important to ask young men how they\u2019re truly feeling, validate\/normalize their emotions and let them cry. I believe that real men cry. Real men cry because they aren\u2019t pretending to be someone they\u2019re not. They\u2019re acting as someone they know best \u2014 themselves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Experiencing something like bullying while also trying to cope with expressing your emotions can be tough. If you\u2019re struggling with an issue \u2014 big or small \u2014 it\u2019s always OK to reach out for help. You can contact Kids Help Phone for non-judgmental support 24\/7. We\u2019re here for you!<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This story was written by a member of Kids Help Phone\u2019s National Youth Council (NYC). Growing up, my Chinese parents told me that boys shouldn\u2019t cry. Instead, boys should be tough, resilient and able to handle their problems by themselves. I don\u2019t blame my parents for raising me this way. They were simply teaching me […]<\/p>\n

Read More…<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"parent":0,"template":"","tags":[97,115,117,118,129,150,155,167,178,179,182,183,200,311,317,337],"articlecategory":[214,254,232,256,257,296],"class_list":["post-15912","articles","type-articles","status-publish","hentry","tag-bullying","tag-friends","tag-relationships","tag-family","tag-school","tag-assault","tag-physical-health","tag-sleep","tag-identity","tag-racism","tag-discrimination","tag-safety","tag-newcomers","tag-equity","tag-real-life-stories","tag-culture","articlecategory-bullying","articlecategory-bullying-abuse","articlecategory-family","articlecategory-friends-family","articlecategory-identity","articlecategory-youth-stories"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nYouth story: Bullying, masculinity and cultural perceptions - Kids Help Phone<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"A young person shares how their culture\u2019s perception of masculinity impacted their experience with bullying and getting support.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/kidshelpphone.ca\/get-info\/youth-story-bullying-masculinity-and-cultural-perceptions\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Youth story: Bullying, masculinity and cultural perceptions\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"A young person shares how their culture\u2019s perception of masculinity impacted their experience with bullying and getting support.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/kidshelpphone.ca\/get-info\/youth-story-bullying-masculinity-and-cultural-perceptions\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Kids Help Phone\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2023-01-13T13:41:15+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/kidshelpphone.ca\/wp-content\/uploads\/illustration-teen-bullying-hallway-school_WP-banner.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"2560\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"1344\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:image\" content=\"https:\/\/kidshelpphone.ca\/wp-content\/uploads\/illustration-teen-bullying-hallway-school_WP-banner.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO Premium plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Youth story: Bullying, masculinity and cultural perceptions - 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